Anteshocks

A wonderful and staggeringly talented friend of my mother-in-law’s who has made the crib bedding for all the babies in the family has finished our girl’s. I got pictures yesterday. Wanna peek?

Oh, wait. You can't. Because I'm not ready to tell you her name yet. =)

Baby Jane Doe gave me my first real scare yesterday, or maybe it could be more accurately classified as a prolonged period of paranoia and baseless, free-floating anxiety. Decreased fetal movement after 29 weeks. If you ever get a hankering to do a Google search on the topic, think twice—there are terrifying stories to be found and very few that will make you feel an iota better.

So yesterday I was a nervous wreck. I tied knots in all knottable objects within reach, I called the OB nurse in the hopes that she would tell me I was being ridiculous, I called one of my best childhood friends, a very GOOD nurse who delivered Alex (and who said to calm down, drink a Coke, and that if the OB nurse told me I was being ridiculous she was just a straight-up bad nurse and I should tell her so). I poked and prodded my belly relentlessly until I elicited a faint, sluggish bump, breathed a sigh of relief, and then faced a wave of fresh worry because sluggish is a terrible adjective!

Finally, gradually, in the midst of all this inner turmoil, baby girl decided to stop tormenting me mentally and return to the good old physical kind. Bouncing on my bladder, testing the elasticity of my ribs, doing that squirmy thing that induces nausea. She’s at it as I type. And I am intensely grateful.

Last night we went on a tour of the hospital where that whole birthing deal is going to happen. It made me excited, and nervous, and speaking of nausea, the C-section prep room smells like surgery and if I have to go there they won’t even have to give me a spinal because I’ll just pass out and save the anesthesiologist a trip. The tour was a barrage of words and images and memories of fear and giddiness. After-hours maternity drop-off, L&D rooms, stirrups, epidurals, skin-to-skin, rooming-in, visitors, nursing, BABY ... oh my.

Yes, indeed. It is perfectly excitifying.